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FALL 1999
Jack Mahon
Woodstown MMCookie Caldwell, PYM staff person for the Young Friends Concerns Group, spoke at Salem Quarterly Meeting held at Mickleton on 13 June 1999.
Cookie talked about the importance of adult presences in children's lives and how much we were influenced by them when we were younger. He gave everyone time to get acquainted with someone else and "reminisce" about at least one adult who made a difference in our life. What many came to acknowledge was that, in addition to the realization, in hindsight, of what a difference one adult can make, there were other times, either as adolescents or younger, when we realized, even as they were interacting with us, that a particular person was making a difference. What happens in these moments is friendship and it is important to take the time to look for those moments when friendship is allowed and encouraged to happen.
He pointed out many facets of the Young Friends program of PYM, among them the simple fact of the amount of time a Young Friends gathering allows for interaction among teens and between adults and teens. If a high-school-age Friend attends First-day School classes every week, that might amount to 52 hours of "interaction" each year. A simple weekend gathering, by itself, allows for 30 waking hours of face to face activity between Young Friends and their adult leaders or Friendly Adult Presences. Attendance at Yearly Meeting provides 48 waking hours, almost as much as "a year" of FDS. The week-long Camp Onas gathering in August will provide 100 hours.
Cookie explained some of the planning that goes into a weekend gathering. The games and activities that may look haphazardly chosen are really structured to facilitate making the "magic" of a gathering happen more easily. Thus, it is more than coincidental that many of our Quaker leaders come directly out of the Young Friends programs.
One example of a planned structure is what one Friend has named the "Ministry of Transportation." Philadelphia Yearly Meeting covers a wide geographical area. Even if we only concerned ourselves with a smaller quarterly meeting area, though, we would see how spread out and distant from each other we are. Most younger Friends don't drive. Even if public transportation were available, some of them would need transportation just to get to it. All this, even the car pooling lists, is a ministry that we, as individual adults and as monthly meetings, provide to our younger members.
Most important, Young Friends activities are geared toward providing as many potentially "transformative" experiences as possible. The recent pilgrimage to the Hague by PYM youth and adults was a transforming experience for many, as was the trip to YouthQuake two years ago. Just the challenge, at age 17, of clerking a meeting will cause one's mind and spirit to expand.
"My, how you've grown!" is more than idle patter. It's an opportunity to examine exactly how children grow. Thus, to say that they do so "in leaps and bounds" is not a cliché. Spiritually, we all grow, not gradually, but in spurts. Cookie pointed out how it's the job of parents, teachers, and youth leaders to provide as many opportunities and challenges to spur that growth as possible.
[Jack's report first appeared in the Woodstown MM newsletter — ED.]RETURN TO TABLE OF CONTENTS
Last modified:
Wednesday, February 18, 2004 at 08:19 AM
